weTalk!
Hello people. Thanks again for always following my blog.
It feels so good to see the number of views rise. As you would have noticed, I'm really into stories revolving around relationships. I have decided to create a platform where we can talk about some issues that are quite popular amongst youths, basically but not restricted to 'relationships', and I hope that you guys will be able to help out with answers to the questions that will follow each short story. It's important to state from the on-set that the stories are majorly true-life stories, but identities - names and locations will be purely fictional.I believe we would all have a nice time contributing and in effect, providing solutions to pressing issues bothering our minds through this platform. Once again, I thank you for following the blog. We start off with the story below.
Enjoy!
***
It was a beautiful Friday afternoon like today. I was in the highest of spirits when I woke up this morning. It rained just like it rained today but the weather won't stop my shine. Fridays came with the usual excitement as the weekend was just hours away but this Friday was different.
"Thank God it's Friday" I screamed as I dashed off into the bathroom where I simultaneously had my morning devotion, singing at the top of my voice; I was actually feeling my voice this morning.
Anyway, I decided to doll myself up to work; that hardly ever happens. You know what they say about make-up artists not having the time to make themselves up? Yeah, I hardly ever had the time to go through the technicalities of the 'professional touch' on myself like I did with my clients.
Let me not bore you with the details of how many compliments I received at work that morning; some people actually thought it was my birthday.
Fast-forward to close of work; 6pm, and I was at my usual bus stop waiting for Deji to show up. He shows up and we begin the long drive from Adeola Odeku to Iyana-Oworo. Traffic was the usual 'evil' type.
"Not tonight, of all nights..." I sighed.
"Pele (sorry)" Deji patted me on the back.
"I'm to set up that venue now... Oh God"
I picked up my phone and put a call through to Tolu to go on with the preparation for the bridal shower.
Oh, I forgot to mention that my friend's bridal shower was scheduled for later that evening.
There's no much to tell about Bimbo and I. We met in school at a program where we both ushered and somehow, we connected. And ever since, we had been in touch. She had so many guy trouble back in school and I was the go-to girl for relationship advice. I still am, especially since I've only been in two relationships all my life; the first one was a total joke from the beginning and I really wasn't so bothered when it ended. The second and the only one for about 7 years now; yes, 7 years; has been with the love of my life, the only one who understands me perfectly - Deji.
By some magic, traffic eased out and we were getting down from the third mainland bridge. Thank God I had the sense to have put my make-up box plus sleep-over and owambe clothes in Deji's car, the previous night when he dropped me off at home. We headed straight for the venue of the bridal shower.
He helped with unloading my stuffs and putting them in Tolu's car, gave me a big hug and he drove off. I smiled as I watched him drive off...
I stood there for a while as I caressed the engagement ring on the third finger of my left palm; still shiny, the stones intact, beautiful as it has always been since the last 2years when he proposed; and 1year, 7 months and 15 days since our introduction.
I've been counting; and you can't blame me.
Look at Bimbo - she met her fiancée two years back and now, I'm organizing a bridal shower for her, and will be doing her make-up tomorrow. I could recount a number of my friends from way back who had gotten in and out of relationships like that and in no time, their boyfriends had proposed, and the other ceremonies including the 'marriage proper' didn't take long.
I've tried to take this ring off but it's the only thing that gives me hope that one day, Deji will come around and eventually marry me. He sure has solid intentions to marry me, right? Else, he wouldn't have proposed in the first place, nor agreed to bring his family down to come meet my own family during the Introduction ceremony, right?
I really don't want to put anymore pressure on him than I've already done; and the whole talking doesn't seem to be helping. He's got plans, at least that 's what he says and I should just hope those plans will include us getting married this year...
I should state here that he has a very good job, and I mean it when I say it's a very good job; has his own car and lives in his own apartment. There's nothing (none that I know of) stopping us from getting married already.
I'm beginning to feel like I should draw up a break-up plan, and actually act like I want to break up; maybe he will realize he's about to lose a gem and then marry me.
Or what do you think I should do?
***
Story by Faith Tunde-Yara
*photo credit: musteredlady.com
It feels so good to see the number of views rise. As you would have noticed, I'm really into stories revolving around relationships. I have decided to create a platform where we can talk about some issues that are quite popular amongst youths, basically but not restricted to 'relationships', and I hope that you guys will be able to help out with answers to the questions that will follow each short story. It's important to state from the on-set that the stories are majorly true-life stories, but identities - names and locations will be purely fictional.I believe we would all have a nice time contributing and in effect, providing solutions to pressing issues bothering our minds through this platform. Once again, I thank you for following the blog. We start off with the story below.
Enjoy!
***
... From a Frustrated 'Engagee"
It was a beautiful Friday afternoon like today. I was in the highest of spirits when I woke up this morning. It rained just like it rained today but the weather won't stop my shine. Fridays came with the usual excitement as the weekend was just hours away but this Friday was different.
"Thank God it's Friday" I screamed as I dashed off into the bathroom where I simultaneously had my morning devotion, singing at the top of my voice; I was actually feeling my voice this morning.
Anyway, I decided to doll myself up to work; that hardly ever happens. You know what they say about make-up artists not having the time to make themselves up? Yeah, I hardly ever had the time to go through the technicalities of the 'professional touch' on myself like I did with my clients.
Let me not bore you with the details of how many compliments I received at work that morning; some people actually thought it was my birthday.
Fast-forward to close of work; 6pm, and I was at my usual bus stop waiting for Deji to show up. He shows up and we begin the long drive from Adeola Odeku to Iyana-Oworo. Traffic was the usual 'evil' type.
"Not tonight, of all nights..." I sighed.
"Pele (sorry)" Deji patted me on the back.
"I'm to set up that venue now... Oh God"
I picked up my phone and put a call through to Tolu to go on with the preparation for the bridal shower.
Oh, I forgot to mention that my friend's bridal shower was scheduled for later that evening.
There's no much to tell about Bimbo and I. We met in school at a program where we both ushered and somehow, we connected. And ever since, we had been in touch. She had so many guy trouble back in school and I was the go-to girl for relationship advice. I still am, especially since I've only been in two relationships all my life; the first one was a total joke from the beginning and I really wasn't so bothered when it ended. The second and the only one for about 7 years now; yes, 7 years; has been with the love of my life, the only one who understands me perfectly - Deji.
By some magic, traffic eased out and we were getting down from the third mainland bridge. Thank God I had the sense to have put my make-up box plus sleep-over and owambe clothes in Deji's car, the previous night when he dropped me off at home. We headed straight for the venue of the bridal shower.
He helped with unloading my stuffs and putting them in Tolu's car, gave me a big hug and he drove off. I smiled as I watched him drive off...
I stood there for a while as I caressed the engagement ring on the third finger of my left palm; still shiny, the stones intact, beautiful as it has always been since the last 2years when he proposed; and 1year, 7 months and 15 days since our introduction.
I've been counting; and you can't blame me.
Look at Bimbo - she met her fiancée two years back and now, I'm organizing a bridal shower for her, and will be doing her make-up tomorrow. I could recount a number of my friends from way back who had gotten in and out of relationships like that and in no time, their boyfriends had proposed, and the other ceremonies including the 'marriage proper' didn't take long.
I've tried to take this ring off but it's the only thing that gives me hope that one day, Deji will come around and eventually marry me. He sure has solid intentions to marry me, right? Else, he wouldn't have proposed in the first place, nor agreed to bring his family down to come meet my own family during the Introduction ceremony, right?
I really don't want to put anymore pressure on him than I've already done; and the whole talking doesn't seem to be helping. He's got plans, at least that 's what he says and I should just hope those plans will include us getting married this year...
I should state here that he has a very good job, and I mean it when I say it's a very good job; has his own car and lives in his own apartment. There's nothing (none that I know of) stopping us from getting married already.
I'm beginning to feel like I should draw up a break-up plan, and actually act like I want to break up; maybe he will realize he's about to lose a gem and then marry me.
Or what do you think I should do?
***
Story by Faith Tunde-Yara
*photo credit: musteredlady.com
My dear,that could lead to some funny relationship ish o,why not keep pestering until he tells you the proposed time frame. You see...some of this so called plans guys have can actually still work even afta marriage.abeg ask him,what are the plans that looks like vision 20-20
ReplyDeleteI agree with Seyi o. kip asking questions till u are able to understand his "plans", especially since you're not even sure u're part of the plans. Guys sha.
ReplyDeleteIt's one thing to be in a relationship for so long and @ least understand the reasons u are not moving ahead, but when the reasons are only conceived, perceived and understood by one party, the other party should BEWARE. A lot of 'long' standing relationships break and ppl wonder what happened when they seemed so perfect together. Communication is key! If your partner doesn't respect u enough to bring u up to date as to his reasons for turning himself to an essential canopy over you, you should really evaluate if it's worth it.
ReplyDeleteHmmnn. A whole lot has been said here. Thanks Olufemi... 👍
DeleteNice fiction. But seriously, what you will do for me now is to sit your bobo down and tell him all you have written here. Then after six months of inaction, get out of that relationship. Ko fa ija o. Tell your parents and his (just because you said you people have done intro Ni o). If a man as described here is not willing to marry you after 1.7yrs of intro, three things are involved; he altogether doesn't like you as a wife again, he thinks he will shock you and the world if he says this, so he thinks he will get over it or he may never get over it and marry you bebe...Don't get me wrong o. Deji still loves you o, he is just not sure about the wife status. I will have said as 1 and 2 comments if there was no intro, but the intro tells me additional time is waste of time. One lesson relationships teaches is that different people have different definitions of love. The only question you will help me ask yourself is if Deji's definition is same as yours. Guys that beat their girls, for example also love their girls. I do not subscribe to lovers speaking different languages. If you will be sincere with me, and forget the fact that you deeply love Deji, he seems to be the only guy that understand you and you guys are cool friends, but you on different pages on so many other things, right? Help God to help you. You don't always have to marry that guy with whom you had the best friendship.
ReplyDeleteWord!
DeleteSerious points for consideration...
Thanks Nike, for stopping by.
I received a mail stating that a certain comment had been dropped here but after refreshing severally without finding it, i've decided to help re-post the comment, just so more people could gain a thing or two:
ReplyDelete"Most of the time, ladies don't know how to "talk". I think that has been a challenge in this relationship...
The scenario makes the guy look kinda like a Phlegmatic - laid back, little-action introvert who was probably pushed or pestered into proposing or having an introduction to begin with.
Ladies should primarily focus on getting to know the personality of their partners and how to get them to talk sincerely. It will take God, a lot of sharpness and self-improvement (among other things) to achieve this. Guys have their work cut out for them to o.
Well, I think you should find a way of getting to know what is actually causing this delay (without nagging of course). If he says he has plans, you deserve to know. Nearly 2 years after introduction is definitely abnormal...people go dey ask questions sef! wetin!
PS. I believe relationships must have mentors. Also a guy who doesn't have a mentor or someone he's genuinely submitted to is very dangerous to go out with"
Maximus Aurelius
If you're having issues publishing your comment, please don't give up. It could be a network problem, as all restrictions have been removed and it should be easy to drop your comments.
ReplyDeleteIf after several attempts, you still can't get through, kindly send your comments to teewaieff@yahoo.com, with your name and indication as to whether you will like your name to appear in front of your comment or not.
Thank you.
I apologize again for any inconvenience.